Creating a plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

Parenting styles and tips
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Written By Poonam Singh

I am co-founder of and Principal of Cambridge Montessori Preschool Bangalore.

Raising a child is a tough task and difficult children can make life miserable. If you observe that your kid is not behaving properly or having some issues lately, you need a solid plan to address the issue. A good plan will help you to track down, regulate, and respond to behavior problems consistently. Managing behavior helps you to change the kid’s behavior without any repulsion. 

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Identifying the problem behaviors | plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

Create a plan that will help change your kid’s behavior. It is essential to define the behavior to understand the source of such behavior. Some of the behaviors are childish while others can be problematic. The parent should be able to distinguish the most problematic behavior. Some concerns help you to distinguish between normal and abnormal behavior. Your kid might exhibit more than one problem behavior, you might have to pick up the problematic behavior based on the priority and solve it one by one. 

plan that will help change your kid's behavior
plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

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Design your discipline strategy

Every kid is unique and the way they respond to different actions is varied. The discipline strategy is unique to different circumstances and environments. While some kids respond better to the gift over the completion of any task or activity. Consider your child’s anger issues and pre-existing behavioral issues. Try and test your strategy to mix and match what better works for you. 

Some of the strategies include praising them regularly for, most of the activities they complete successfully or playing some discipline-based game to encourage them to follow rules. Make sure that you provide positive motivation to your kids to change their behavior. 

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Set realistic goals 

It can be easy to create your desired goals but what’s best is to do what’s possible. Sometimes, over-complex plans can prove to be bad than good. It is a bad ambition of parents to have high hopes for kids. If we can’t achieve high goals ourselves in our life, we have no right to expect extraordinary results from our kids. If you are setting high goals for your kids, rather than helping your kid improve, you are familiarising them with a sense of failure.  

Note down your strategies 

As soon as you get a strategy to implement make sure that you note down all of them which are likely to help change the behavior of the child. Outline and note down the method in which you would enforce the strategy and how will it change the behavior of the kid. Plan the strategy that your child can understand and implement. Make sure that you use terms that are dear to your kids and can understand.

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Use a behavior chart 

Your child would not understand or comply with a behavior chart if you implement old strategies. Even though a reward strategy might work, a bit of creativity can help your child please you with a change in behavior. 

A behavior chart helps to track down the progress of the plans and helps you to switch over and create better plans that can help you achieve goals. 

Focus on what’s important

Changing behavior is a complex task as it involves emotions, responses, and mindset. Every child is different and the difference in the environment makes every successful plan unique. It can be easy to get away with other successful plans or strategies that might not work for you. In such cases, focus on what’s important. Set goals that are simple and approachable. If the goals are vague with high expectations, it is very difficult for you to achieve the behavior change in your child, also risking your child misbehaving. 

plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

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Effective communication

As you plan out the strategy, it is also important to plan out the way you will communicate. After all, communication is an important aspect of the implementation of the plan, Even if your plan is 100% fool-proof and is most likely to succeed and work, poor communication can completely flip over the result. If your kid is not able to interpret what you want him to understand, your strategy might not work. 

Review your plans 

Once you implement and execute the plan, make sure you review the effectiveness of the strategy, Not all strategies are suggested to work, but the effects might differ. Also, not all strategy works at one shot. Continued implementation of a strategy is important for the success of behavioral change, especially when the behavior is critically problematic. Also, ask all the caregivers of the child to implement your strategy to speed up its effectiveness. Try to get teachers and other adults around the child who play a significant role in the life of your child. Communicate with other people to know the progress of your child when you are not around. 

Consistency of the strategy is the key to the success of any plan, especially when it deals with behavioral changes. Revisit your plan whenever required. A fresh perspective may help put an end to the problematic misbehavior. 

Keep modifying 

It is easier to get comfortable with a strategy that works. But you also need to focus on other complex behavior problems or future behavior changes. As your child grows up, they face a new set of experiences. A new set of experiences requires a new strategy with a different perspective. 

plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

Some of the common problematic behavior that most of the child has and ways to solve it 

Now that you are clear on how you can curate your plan, we offer some solutions that you can implement for some of the common problems that the parents face daily. The way you respond to their behavior plays a huge role in how the child will react to it in the future.


Lying is one of the most common problems that parents face. It is most likely because the kid observed you or anyone around lying and understanding how convenient it is to get away with lies. 

  • Make your child understand the consequence of lying 
  • Emphasis them to tell the truth 
  • Praise them when they the truth 


It is very common for your child to ignore you when you tell them to do any activity. They may either not respond to you or may say “NO”. In such cases, you can warn your child over the consequence of not following up on your words. If the warning doesn’t work, actually implement the consequence consistently, so that the child learns to listen to you in the first place. 

You may be dealing with a kid who is a picky eater. It can lead to other problems like body image issues and other health problems. It is important to develop a healthy attitude towards food. Make them understand that food is fuel to the body, not to comfort them for the mere satisfaction of hunger. One of the misconceptions that most kids have is that healthy foods taste bad. Talk on how vegetables are delicious and make the dishes visually appealing to the kids. 


Name-calling, throwing tantrums, and whining are some of the ways which show the disrespectful behavior of your kid. Most of the time, the kids expect attention to such behavior and want you to react a certain way. The best immediate action is to ignore them, signaling your disapproval in some way. You can also execute the consequences of their disrespecting behavior by taking away a privilege or imposing new rules. 


Your kid might not know how to express aggression without being violent. That’s why a lot of kids behave inappropriately when they are sad or aggressive. Giving consequences is the best way to control the act of aggression. If the aggression does not get better with time, seek professional help. 

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the plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

FAQ – How to Create an Effective Behavior Management Plan

How do you create a behavior change plan?

If you want to change your behavior, you need to create a plan. This plan should be specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound. First, you need to decide what behavior you want to change. Second, you need to figure out why you want to change this behavior. Once you know your reason for the change, you can create a plan that will help you achieve your goal. Your plan should be something that you can realistically stick to and that will help you reach your goal.

What is the best way to get children to change their behavior?

One way to get children to change their behavior is to use positive reinforcement. This means rewarding them when they display the desired behavior. For example, if a child is trying to potty train, you would give them a sticker or a small toy after they use the toilet successfully. Another way to get children to change their behavior is to use negative reinforcement. This means taking away something unpleasant after the desired behavior is displayed. For example, if a child is misbehaving in class, you might take away their recess time.

What are three strategies parents can use to improve a child’s behavior?

There are three key strategies that parents can use to improve a child’s behavior.
First, parents should provide clear and consistent rules for their children.
Second, they should praise their children for good behavior and provide positive reinforcement.
Finally, they should use logical consequences for bad behavior. By using these strategies, parents can help their children learn how to behave in a positive and productive manner.


plan that will help change your kid’s behavior – The best way to address a child’s behavior is by implementing consistent discipline strategies. Every child is different, hence the strategies are varied. 

Creating a plan that will help change your kid’s behavior

I am co-founder of and Principal of Cambridge Montessori Preschool and DayCare Kaggadasapura Branch. I am also a Montessori certified teacher and have 5+ years of experience working with kids.

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